beatz d nadtz

Wednesday, January 26, 2005

Circle of life

Saat dunia berputar sehari lagi... banyak peristiwa yang terjadi.... ada kelahiran ada kematian. Ada pernikahan ada perceraian. Ada suka ada duka... semua diatur oleh-Nya untuk satu tujuan baik... menjadikan qta manusia yang lebih baik. Mengajar qta untuk bersyukur pada apa yang telah qta punya.

Setelah Om Rudy meninggal karena sakitnya 1 Oktober 2004 kemarin, ciciek Cilla positif hamil dan diperkirakan akan lahir awal Juli... mungkinkah bisa 1 Juli 2005 ??? tepat pada hari ulang tahun Om Rudy ???

Setelah Emak meninggal 1 Desember 2004, ciciek positif hamil untuk yg kedua kalinya. so ... aku akan punya 2 keponakan :D Good news yah...

???

Bimbang....
Takut tuk melangkah
Ditengah ketidakpastian

Kini tak mampu bersuara
Tak berani mengucap kata
Hanya tinggal dalam keheningan

Saat hati penuh bunga2
Merenda mimpi dengan seksama
Kini terhempas dalam sekejap
Hilang semua rasa di hati

Saat ini... semua yang kuperbuat seperti salah. Tak tau harus kemana. Hatiku penuh kebimbangan, tak mengerti langkah mana yg seharusnya kuambil. Hanya mampu mengikuti kemana arus yang akan membawaku. Berharap arus mengantarku sampai ke tujuanku... tapi aku takkan tau hingga kutiba nanti.

Apa tujuan hidupku? Apa yang paling kuinginkan? Kemana cintaku akan berlabuh? Benarkah jalanku kini ?

Tersenyum hanya kepada bintang
Menikmati keheningan malam...

Sungguh aku berharap dapat menatap keindahan langit malam penuh bintang seperti malam itu... bersama orang2 yang aku cintai... entah kapan kan terulang kembali.

Tuesday, January 18, 2005

Tell me about me....

Beberapa orang temen berbicara soal diriku :
+ ceria
+ friendly
+ baek
+ semangat
+ perkasa
+ anak sehat

+/- hard worker

- ga sabaran
- ngambekan
- stubborn
- karepe dewe
- clumsy
- minderan

want to complete the list ??? :D

Surprised Me Not

SATURDAY, JAN 15, 2005

I went to Manyar wimming Pool in the morning, swim around till 9am then take a nice shower then pick up juzzy at her house. I went with her to Rembaka to deliver some chicken and the goodbye note which i owe them before i left.

I see Irene & Anna, Meta n Mbak Erna. I realized one thing... i don't see any good impressions about me in their eyes. Not even ask me about how am i doing since the resign note or something "basa-basi" like that. Hmmm.. Why i am not surprised at all??? But trully i'm a little dissapointed. At least i want to be remembered as "someone" there. Does a year and 8 months just not long enough for people to see me as a person?

Well.. i left rembaka with unknown feeling, but relief.. I asked juzzy if she want to eat "soto Cak To" near there. I know the "waroeng" always crowded with people and some "friends" telling me that the "soto" quite delicious. And... maybe that will be a nice ending for all my memories of Rembaka. And luckily, juzz didn't mind to accompany me.

The "soto" taste not bad, but i don't think i will go and eat there again. It is too far far away from home!



I enjoy the day i find love, I enjoy the day i feel warmed inside.


The rest of the day just going well. I met Wiem, another ex-office friend and Mey Ling, a very best friend of mine since junior school. Play a car race game and "cetok2" game at the funpolis. The biggest fun of that day is... BOM BOM CAR !!! Hit everybody's car, hearing the noise of BOM BOM CAR, laughing together... everything make the day worth a lot! Lovely memories right! too bad no documentation that day :(

We spent most time at starbucks (about 3 hours?)... talking about things.... secrets... private... hm.... really make us became closer and knowing each other...

The day was sooooo perfect too me :D

Pasca Explosion

It's been a while since my last blogwrite. Many things happened, some questions answered, and more problems showed up... but.... i'm calming now... don't wanna think too much... i want to focus on me... myself. About my present, my future, about what i really want.

After my last big fight with my bro, i feel i had enough. I need sometime alone... outside my family envy. I don't need any of them. I just feel i can do things alone, independently. But then i have to think more. What happend to the family without me? can mom survive? she'll done everything alone without me. Stuck on that family... our family. that's why i need to be on mom's side... so.. i erased all the thoughts of being a "anak kost". Besides, who will take me to work? There's noway i can take the car if i want to be seriously independent! The car is mom's right ?! And does my salary will be enough 4 my expenses?

Well well... finnaly my decisions made up:) but... i cannot guarantee that it will last forever, i am a human being, not somekind of stone, so there are possibilities of changing mind right?! :D

Sunday, January 16, 2005

Surprising Eren : Failed

Kemarin sengaja cuti buat bikin kue. Bikin kue soes pake resep oma - sampe 2 kali bikin - gatal total :(. Bikin kue coklat juga hasilnya jadi semi-cookies coklat. :(( malangnya eren. Tapi mau ga mau, aku udah bikin, n dee harus makan itu semua :p. hehehe


soes episode I

Kuenya tak coba bentuk hati, tapi bentuk hatinya isa jelek banget. Akhirnya mama kembali turun tangan. Mama yang potongin kue coklatnya jadi bentuk hati.


chocolate slice semi cookies

Trussss aku culik temen2 u/ ke PTC ngasih surprise ke eren pas dia lagi jaga pameran.... tapi tapi... aku telat, aku kemalaman. Cuma beda 10/15 menit dari eren pulang. hiks... kecewa... ??? iya sehhhh. udah susah susah bikin -_______-. Sampe senewen segala.


xpresi of kecewa

Tapi gpp. Masih ada hari. Hari ini bisa dikasihkan :p. Hopefuly.... Harusnya... Kewajibannya... dia harus suka kuenya.... huahahahaa... ^-^

Thursday, January 06, 2005

Wonderful Today

Menatap langit tak berkedip
Menghirup udara penuh kenikmatan
Menjalani hidup lebih baik
Mencari ketenangan hati yang tahan lama

Beberapa hari udah kulewati sejak pergantian tahun. Puas? Yep...! I'm feeling so good these days....! Suasana kantor di siang hari yang dulu pernah kurasa membosankan - sekarangpun keliatannya masih :p - kini aku bisa lebih menikmatinya. Atmosphere tempat ini di pagi hari - duduk diam di depan kompi sambil cengengesan sendiri, musik slow ala dj Unuz, nyegat orang lewat yang jual makanan karena lapar. huahaha... pagi ini bener2 biasa!